Thinking

I have ridden horses most of my life. One of the things that I loved best about it was when my mind was stuffed full of all the things that were going on in my life, I could saddle up my horse and ride for hours just thinking. By the time I came back, I had the worlds problems either solved or forgotten. Man, I need a horse again. I am at a crossroads in so many ways right now. A future that I partial have to leave in someone elses hands and mind, which is insanely hard for me to do. I see what I want, ready to be there, but the rest is in anothers hands. There is school ... do I finish teaching, do something medical related? What's the best, most secure thing I can do for my family? And then there are my kids and the decision that I need to make that will impact thier lives. I don't want to make it because I don't know which is the lesser of two evils. When all else fails take it to the Lord is my theory. It has worked every other time, so I guess that is my best option.

You aren't going to read very many vent post hopefully, but sometimes you just gotta get it out and read it to feel better. I am terrible with talking, emotions get the best of me. But I can write a novel if I need too. It's just how I work. And no, I am not worrying and stressing over things, I just know God has great things in store for us all, and I want to fulfill everything that he has planned for me.